Sailors on the Sea

Monday, January 5, 2009

Mighty Clouds of Joy - Different Progress

Today is Progress Report Day.

I have not been addressing The Great Sea this past week. I have been working on something else: Apprentice. So I will give you a report on my progress with that.

The story is in two (2) files. The original file contains the text I wrote as part of a writing exercise, from OneTwoFiver, which my friend FairyHedgeHog pointed me to by means of creating a link to it on her blog. To this file I began writing the story. Then I stopped and created a new file and put the actual story there. So now I have the Orginal File, which contains the 500 words of original text and a portion of the actual story, and the Story File, which contains just over 4,500 words.

This story is unlike any I have ever written before. The closest I have come to it are portions of Tavaar's backstory. But I resisted letting Tavaar's backstory take me where it wanted to go. There is too much judgment associated with Swords of Fire right now. It's the story I want to get published, but I didn't write it nearly so well as I should have. That's what makes Apprentice so wonderful. I can go there and write what I will. I'm feeling a sense of freedom (happiness) I haven't felt since Mrs. Kohner (my high school creative writing teacher) told me to 'Write what you want, not what you think you're supposed to, and to hell with what other people think.' Mrs. Kohner was cool.

I don't know how many people read this blog. I know there is one ([smiles] Thank You). Perhaps some of you (if 'some' is a valid word, as opposed to simply saying 'you') think me odd - to put it nicely - for reacting so to a simple piece of writing. (I know one of you doesn't care about whether I am odd or not. Thank you.) But for me this is an exciting expedition. I am going to learn something, and I don't know what it is. I haven't actually written the words I need to write to complete this new exploration, but as I near that climactic moment my happiness increases. Something inside me is about to breath fresh air - perhaps for the first time. It's like a birth, isn't it?

In honor of my newfound happiness, I have made Today's Music the Rock 'n' Roll song which makes me feel happiest: B.J.Thomas's Mighty Clouds of Joy. Here are the words as I sing them (Oh, God, I wish I could sing this well). I deliberately change some words. Sorry B.J. (My initials [grin].)

Them old bad dreams
been sleeping in your bed

And them old dark clouds
been a-hanging around your head

But all your hard times
will vanish in the wind

When those mighty clouds of joy
come rolling in

Hold me Jesus
Let-a-your love sieze us
Oh let us find sweet peace within [hallelujah]

Hallelujah
Happiness begins
When those mighty clouds of joy
come rolling in

Those old storm clouds
are slowly drifting by

And those old rain drops
are fading from your eyes

Whoah, Mr. Son,
come shine on us again

When those mighty clouds of joy
come rolling in

O-o-o-o-h, Hold me Jesus
Letchore love sieze us, Jesus
Oh let us find sweet peace within [hallelujah]

Hallelujah
Happiness begins
When those mighty clouds of joy
come rolling in

O-o-o-o-o-oh, Hold me Je-e-su-us
Please, let your love sieze us, Jesus
Oh let us find sweet peace within [hallelujah]

Ha-a-llelu-u-ja-ah
Happiness begins
When those. Mighty. CLOUDS. OF JOY
come rolling in

O-o-o-o-oh. Ho-ld me, Jesus
Won't you let me just SEE ya, Jesus
Oh let us find sweet peace withi-i-i-i-i-i-in [hallelujah]

Oh, Ha-a-llelu-u-ja-ah
Happiness begins
When those mighty clouds of joy
come rolling in
come rolling in

9 comments:

fairyhedgehog said...

Mrs Kohner sounds like a seriously cool teacher.

Glad you're so happy today.

Bevie said...

Thank you, and good morning. It is here anwyay.

Dear Mrs. Kohner. Yes. When I first arrived at the school I was kind of afraid of her. She had sharp features, and she could talk fast and with authority. Quite intimidating.

But as a creative writing teacher she was wonderful. She taught me to write what I wanted, and I wrote some incredible things. Not talking quality, here. More subject matter. The only one in my family who might have understood would have been Grandma, but I didn't know it at the time. Although I knew Grandma like to tell/write stories (she was published a few times in newspapers and magazines) I didn't understand her acceptance of a story as a story until the last few years before she left.

Over the years I think I forgot many of Mrs. Kohner's lessons. Certainly I forgot the one about writing what's inside me.

Mrs. Kohner was not at the school every year. I was lucky to have her all through my senior high (10th, 11th and 12th grades). I took creative writing and a couple other English classes with her.

When she was not teaching, she was at a nearby facility 'drying out'. Mrs. Kohner was a bundle of nerves and she took various pills to calm herself. Personally, I think it was the pills which made her a bundle of nerves. Anyway, every few years she would have to take a year away to wean herself from her pills. She would return and the process would begin again. I expect she is gone now. She was at least in her forties forty years ago. Maybe she's around. I wouldn't know how to find her, though. She kept changing her last name.

I am happy. Thank you. Partly, it is having my music back. But also I think I may finish Apprentice either today or tomorrow. If I do, would you like me to email you a text-only copy? I'm guessing, but I think it will go 6-8,000 words. I want someone to read it - in its entirety - but I don't think Spouse is quite ready yet. No more anger, but we're still not to the approval stage.

Would you read it? You can share it with your Spouse, or anyone you think might have an interest in it. (That wouldn't make it a "published" work, would it?) Or does it sound like a daunting task? Don't feel like you have to. I understand that other people have serious time commitments.

Thanks, FH. Have a very good day.

Andrew Clarke said...

This is a change of subject, but if you like reading and ever enjoy fantasy, can I suggest a novel to look at? "Outcasts Of Skagaray" can be previewed by reading the sample chapters on www.threeswans.com.au It contains themes like C.S.Lewis' writing, dealing with God and faith. Whatever happens, if you feel like visiting my blog, it is http://threeswans.blogspot.com Best wishes

Bevie said...

Andrew, good morning. Welcome to my blog.

I did visit your blog. You have a nice family. Congratuations on the new addition.

Regarding the book, thank you. I will certainly check it out.

However, if I may, your post does come across a bit like advertising. By presenting your book instead of revealing anything of yourself, you come across as a pushy salesman. That may read as offensive, and if so, I apologize.

But you revealed nothing of yourself, not even how you came to visit my blog.

Others, who have more experience with blogging, might simply remove your post - because of the appearance of advertising. To be honest, I don't know what to do. Blogging is new to me, and this is even more so. I have no doubt you are a decent person.

It comes down to manners, and the problem that what one person considers good protocol, another may view as rude.

You may be served better by introducing yourself with a softer approach. Try to learn "what the Romans do", so you can act within the guidelines. That is the best way to make friends (and ultimately sales, if that's your goal). It can be difficult, and it always takes time and patience. I have accidentally offended lots of people. (Perhaps I have offended you, now.) It's hard. But if we really care we keep trying.

Regarding this piece of advertising I will let it sit - for now. I don't get many visitors, but if those who do wish to render an opinion/give advice, I would be grateful to read it. This is a case where I will remind all they can post Anonymously.

At least you did not do that, Andrew.

I am sorry to sound like a teacher, but I believe you should know what I think. Sometimes I'm actually right.

It comes down to this: If I believe the reason you have contacted me is because you found something about me even remotely interesting, I am flattered. If I believe the reason you contacted me is because you have something to sell - I am not.

It has nothing to do with who you are. It is how you introduced yourself.

laughingwolf said...

hi bevie, as i said in your other blog, i like your writing, rough or otherwise... and plan to read all i can

Bevie said...

Thank you, LaughingWolf. I wish I had the power to make editors and agents feel the same way. In the meantime, I just have to keep trying to learn how to polish correctly.

Have a good day.

fairyhedgehog said...

I like the way you handled Andrew and his spam. I get the impression he means well but what you said is spot on.

I handled it on my blog by deleting his post, explaining why, and suggesting that he come and join in more fully.

I'm not sure he is reading the comments he gets but I really hope he reads yours because you've spelled out to him what he is doing that will irritate people.

Miladysa said...

Hello BBJD :D

Laughing Wolf introduced me to your blogs. I'm looking forward to reading more about your story.

Bevie said...

Welcome, MyLadySa.

I expect you are talking about Tavaar. I love Tavaar, and I think she's very interesting and cool. I'm still in the early stages of what I wrote about her. Some really cool stuff is yet to come. I hope you enjoy it.

Thanks for visiting.

Contributors

A Tentative Schedule

Monday - Progress Report
Where am I with regard to the Current Book

Tuesday - Thoughts About Writing
I was going to be profound, but let's be real

Wednesday - What Am I Learning
What can I take from what I am doing

Thursday - Work Sent Out For Review
Respondes to my submissions

Friday - Other Works of Fantasy
Some of my other fantasy writing

Saturday - The Impact of Music
How music has influenced what I write

Sunday - Venting
My 'morbid' time. A safe compromise, I think