The Play's the Thing

I used to be involved in theatre. It began when I was a junior in high school. Before that I had always wanted to do drama, but never dared try. In grade school I was always jealous of my popular classmates who were chosen to play the speaking parts in class skits performed before parents. While a few of them were (admittedly) good, most were not. They spoke their lines deadpan, and so it was with great frustration that I sat with the other unpopulars to sing group songs instead of play a real part.

When I signed up for classes to begin my junior year I chose a class about plays. We wouldn't be putting one on, but we would get to read plays. We had done that in Eighth Grade English. We read Antigone, and I read the part of Creon. Everyone liked my reading, too. They thought I did great, but when I read a certain line, I hung my head because EVERYONE was laughing. The line?

Antigone
Who knows that this is holiness below?

Creon
Never the enemy, even in death, a friend.

Antigone
I cannot share in hatred, but in love.

Creon
Then go down there, if you must love, and love
the dead. No woman rules me while I live.
Ismene is brought from the palace under guard

Chorus
Look there! Ismene is coming out.
She loves her sister and mourns,
with clouded brow and bloodied cheeks,
tears on her lovely face.

Creon
You, lurking like a viper in the house,
who sucked me dry.

To a room full of teenagers, that is a very funny line. We later did Yesterday is Tomorrow, an episode from the original Star Trek. I read Spock's part.

Well, back to my junior year.

It was only about a month into the new school year when Stephen's younger brother, who was also in the class with me, and who was so very talented at music and acting, suggested I try out for the fall play. He said it was a waste for me not to. With his encouragment, I did. The play was The Hobbit, by J.R.R.Tolkien (whom I had never heard of). I got one on-stage part and one off-stage part.

My on-stage part was The Great Goblin. I got that because of my size. I was already 6'4". I didn't get the part I wanted: Gandalf. That went to Tim, my best friend after Stephen. Tim had been involved with theatre since eighth grade.

My off-stage part was The Voice of Smaug, the Dragon. Dan C played the character on-stage. He wore a large dragon head which prevented his voice from being heard by the audience. He got the on-stage performance instead of the voice because: a) he had a squeaky, girl's voice; b) he was already 6'5".

I had a blast. It was like coming home. In fact, I had so much fun that I chose the spring play, Diary of Anne Frank, over playing baseball. That put me on the outs with the school's sports community for the rest of my time in school. They never forgave me for that. But I enjoyed playing Otto Frank.

The following fall I was in Curious Savage, by John Patrick, playing a patient in a mental institution. That was probably the most fun of all.

In college I was in The Show-Off, by George Kelly. And then, everything fell apart. I was out of college and out of theatre. It wasn't until the late 1980s when I dared try out for a part in a community theatre production, Neil Simon's, Fools. I played the villain, and on the Friday night performance got my fifteen minutes of fame. The audience gave me a standing ovation. And that was the end.

There is no community theatre around here. The high school doesn't even put on productions. All there is, is a grade school teacher who keeps telling everyone how wonderful she is. The plays are all written by her for grade school and middle school children. If I had credentials, I would offer to become the high school theatre director. But I have none. Another dream. Wasted.